when to hold ’em, when to fold ’em…1-6-22


Decisions. Daily. We weigh desire against risk. Calculate probability in the face of longing. Concern for safety rides in direct opposition to our acute yearning. You would think by now we’d be incredibly skilled at judgment calls. Me? I feel lost sometimes, find myself wavering more than ever. Perched for too long and very uncomfortably on the proverbial fence. So not my style. Never has been.

Faced with yet another moment of indecision, I chose to dig underneath the fence. And lo and behold, a well-used shovel—5Rhythms wisdom— was right at hand to dredge up some truth. Have a current looming decision? Willing to take a quick inventory? Start right where you are and picture the particulars of what you are considering. As much detail as possible, put yourself in the virtual reality of “yes”.

BODY: For me, it’s all about belly and feet. How do these body parts rest in that yes? Easily? Do they feel like moving toward? Eagerly? Or is there hesitation? Queasiness? Are they congruent? Or are feet pointed one way and belly another. Breathe. Is your body a yes or a no?

HEART: Let your breath move all around the heart space. Feel the longing, the desire, the yearning. Feel for shut down, protectiveness, holding back. Is your heart a yes or a no?

MIND: O.K. Head up there. That place where all the logical overabundance of most current information is stored. Let the mind say its piece. Listen up. Really take it in. Minds are useful. Is your mind a yes or a no?

SOUL: Now it’s time to feel into one of two things: the perfect line-up of body, heart, mind…or the utter mismatch. If all three shout yes or all three are an emphatic no, your soul can rest in this alignment. Clarity and integrity are yours. If there is divergence, your soul is wading through a torturous moment. Which is even more precarious if the yes and/or no are muffled or conditional or vague. Times like this are especially bewildering if your soul—the authentic expression of who you are in this world—is not able to show up in the way it hungers to. That’s why this is so hard.

SPIRIT: Take another few breaths. Feel spirit moving right through you, connecting you with all things. Rest in the spaciousness of past, present, future. In the biggest picture, in the world of birth and life and death…how important is this yes/no? A year from now, will you remember this moment? What would God/Jesus/Buddha/(fill in blank) do?

And as long as were asking for an outside opinion, the creatrix of this very rhythms guideline, Gabrielle Roth, put it simply like this:

“There is no maybe. If it’s not a yes, it’s a no.”

Which brings me smack dab in touch with my old style, no-nonsense Bella who totally knows when to hold ’em and when to fold ’em. The rational one who knows the next hand will be dealt soon enough.

What’s coming right up?
Friday morning: Essential exploration of the spine, feeling the way it’s a connector (skull, rib cage, pelvis) AND a protector (nervous system). How it moves just like the ocean waves.
Sunday morning: Out in the garden (or Zoom) playing musical waves as antidote to despair, tapping the way this practice can actually lift us, lighten us, inspire wonder.

Feeling you all out there in this moment with me…let’s move together.